TNA iMPACT Wrestling review results

TNA iMPACT Wrestling

The Coronation Of Magnus, the greatest champion ever, in Dixieland.  6’3″, 17 stones (238 lbs), 27 years old, Magnus. 
Perfect cheap WWE imitation.

Kurt Angle blah, blah, blah + Bobby Roode blah, blah, blah…  The two brawled, security separated them, 98-pound weakling Rockstar Spud got shoved.  Spud announced the match for tonight.

Dixie Carter stated that it took her 11 long years to find the perfect heavyweight champion.  And now she find him in the person of Magnus.

Knockout Champion Gail Kim vs. Madison Rayne
Madison Rayne miraculously won with a pin after being trashed during the entire match.  By the way, it was a non-title match. 

X-Division champion Austin Aries vs. Chris Sabin
How can a guy like Chris Sabin can treat a bombshell like Velvet Sky like shit?  Chris Sabin defeated Austin Aries thankx to the distraction of Velvet Sky.  Velvet Sky seems to have a crush on Aries.  I now understand why Sabin treats her like shit!

Douchebag Spud backstage…

Samuel Shaw vs. a 140-pound jobber
Samual Shaw destroyed the ridiculously skinny jobber named  Norm Fermont or something like that.

Bobby Roodes & James Storm vs. Kurt Angle & Gunner
Is this the official reunion of Beer Money?  10 minutes of boring ring entrances…  Beer Money AKA James Storm & Bobby Roodes won.

Backstage segment: Sting wanna talk to Dixie.

EC3 bullshitting about Jeff Hardy in the ring…  Sting came out to defends his little girlfriend.. Blah, blah, blah…

Bully Ray threatened Joseph Parks that he will set his fat ass on fire.  LOL 🙂  If only it could be true.

Bully Ray vs. Joseph Parks
Bully Ray did nothing except kicking Joseph Parks in the nuts.  Well done!  Parks won by disqualification but Bully Ray covered him with lighter fuel.  But just when he was on verge to lit the fat lawyer.  Mr. Anderson came to his rescue just to be spreaded with lighter gas also.  Bully Ray didn’t set anybody on fire (unfortunately) and leaved the ring.

The Coronation of the new TNA World Heavyweight Champion

Poor mans Brad Maddox, Rockstar Scrub United Kingdom royalty blah, blah, blah with Ethan Carter III / EC3 at his side…  EC3 wearing ugly brown-shit pants is the master of ceremony… Instead of celebrating Magnus, EC3 blow his own trumpet.  Then tell us that Magnus rules the world???  Then EC3 introduces his millionaire MILF “aunt” Dixie Carter.

Magnus does his speech.  The crowd booo loudly, probably plants or pre-recorded sounds. loll. 

Gunner with his fuckin’ briefcase…  Ouuu!!  Magnus don’t have to be affraid since I don’t see Gunner as a serious threat.  But anything is possible in the weird world of wrestling…  Gunner wants to cash-in.  But instead he was triple-teamed by Magnus, Scrub and EC3… Til the “real” World Heavyweight Champion A.J. Styles came to challenge the corporate champion Magnus.

The TNA World Heavyweight Championship situation is kind of confusing?

Now TNA even try to copy the WWE Unification Match angle between John Cena and Randy Orton!!

No! No! No! Yes! Yes! Yes! The damn Dixie Carter’s TNA are now stealing from WWE’s Daniel Bryan.  Nothing original can come from this second-rated wrestling league…

I just wish that Magnus’s reign as corporate champion will be longer than Jeff Hardy reign during the Hogan / Bischoff TNA era.

TNA Wrestling equals cheap WWE knock off.

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