lundi 3 mars 2014

WWE Raw March 3 results

Watch WWE Monday Night Raw replay on demand
(episode Monday, March 3, 2014)

CM PUNK MUSIC!!!! Fuck it's Paul Heyman. Nonetheless, an excellent Paul Heyman's speech about how his "Paul Heyman Guy" never had his place in the corporate world of WWE. Heyman finally blames the WWE Universe (fans) to took CM Punk away from him. Heyman blames The Undertaker for sending CM Punk last year at WrestleMania 29. To finally turning the speech into a pro Brock Lesnar speech.Promoting the WrestleMania 30 match between The Undertaker and Brock Lesnar... 

Fat Henry comes to challenge Lesnar. He probably wants to get his arm broken for the third time. It was predictable! Brock Lesnar destroys the 400+pounds Mark Henry and F-5'd him through the announcer table.

WWE Tag Team Champions New Age Outlaws vs. The Usos
The Usos are your new tag team champions. Even if I'm very far from being a Usos's fan. It was about time that they wins the titles. They earns it!

Another movie with a diva??? I don't care! 

Intercontinental Champion Big E vs. Cesaro
"The Swiss Superman" dominates the match til the jealous piece of shit Swagger attacks Big E to gets Cesaro disqualified.

The Shield vs. Wyatt Family
Bray Wyatt pins Dean Ambrose after Seth Rollins leaved the fight in protest to Ambrose's shitty attitude.

Intergender tag team match: Santino & Emma vs. Fandango & Summer Rae
Damn! Summer Rae is fuckin' hot!!! The clumsy and goofy Emma makes Summer Rae tap-out for the victory.

Christian vs. Sheamus
"The Albinos Redhead Warrior" defeats Christian. Too long!

Backstage interview with Sheamus... Christian attacks Sheamus.

The Bella Twins vs. Alicia Fox & Aksana
Bella Twins wins.

Daniel Bryan in-ring speech... The Authority arrives... Bryan challenges COO Triple H for a match at WrestleMania... Triple H responds by saying he will not fight B+ players at WrestleMania... Stephanie calls Corporate Kane... Bryan attacks Kane... The security staff forces Bryan to leave.
 Nicolás Del Rio's photo.

RAW pannel. Two has-beens (Booker T & Jim Duggan) and a jobber (Alex Riley). Who give a fuck?

Dolph Ziggler in a car with Aaron Paul?  
Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio
A miracle! Dolph Ziggler wins! 

Photo: Congrats to the latest inductee of the Hall of Fame Class of 2014 Paul Bearer
Paul Bearer in the WWE Hall Of Fame Oooohhh Yeeeeeaaaaah!

Jack Swagger vs. Big E
Big E wins by disqualification when Cesaro attacks at the beginning of the match.
Jack Swagger and Cesaro almost fight each other til -very long to react- Zeb Colter interfere to stop them.

John Cena blah, blah, blah
A lot of loud "CM Punk" chants... Everybody in Chicago seems to hate Cena... Cena pointless speech til Bray Wyatt and his disciples appears on the giant for more unintelligible boring crap.

Alexander Russev live promo with an introduction from his hot blonde valet.

Bootista vs. Daniel Bryan
I can smell a lot of booing and YES! chants in this one... Randy Orton will sit at ringside for the match... It is past 23h00 and the match isn't started yet. I can smell a Randy Orton attack... "Bootista" chants... "You can't wrestle" chants... "CM Punk" chants... "Yes!" chants... It was predictable, The Authority comes at ringside. Orton attacks both wrestlers after being provoked by Batista.  It's all end with COO Triple H pedigree's an hapless Daniel Bryan.

There were no CM Punk.
The WWE Universe was trolled.
 Chris Heisenberg's photo.

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